When I was young, let’s say when I was in school, I wrote poems. Poems about friendship, seasons, my family…crushes and even my first love! When we formed SARRA (our band), I even penned a few songs, which I must admit never found their tune since I was always so worried about public censure! I also wrote a diary, towards which I was fiercely religious! But when I tried my hand at writing for the school magazine, I found myself to be politely rejected! Not that I was tested on my writing skills…it was just a one-on-one interview, thank God, I never got to write for it! In college, my room mate and I were inspired to write a play. During my post graduation, I tried my hand at story writing and even screenplay…all because it was part of my curriculum!
Anyways, the purpose behind writing such a long preamble to my writing career is that I have written on several occasions. Sometimes for the sake of self expression, at others for the sake of others! But on all these occasions, I never took it seriously…never attached any importance to the act of writing a piece of fiction.
Fiction stimulates me…I always say that one must remember a book for the story it tells. In fact that goes for any piece of writing. If the content is worth reading, there’d always be someone wanting to read it. Now I wish, I had shared my poems and not stacked them away. I wish I had sung those songs, maybe SARRA would have won some more competitions! That was my writer’s block…never had the courage! I could never take the plunge! There wasn’t a dearth of ideas…never! They always kept flowing…and I always kept writing. Just that I was a coward…too worried about what people would think of me!
For all those people who have known me since my growing up days, this would be a revelation of sorts. I have never shared my writings with anyone! In fact till date, I have never kept a copy of anything! Phew…all those moments of self indulgence are a waste now. I would write something, read it aloud, keep it for a few days and then tear it away! I think I only treasured the (chat) chits that we circulated in class 7th the longest!
It’s taken me a while to come to terms with my writer’s block…today I am not scared of public opinion. I am not scared of the brick-bracks. I may not be as good as a Jhumpa Lahiri…but hey, I may have something worth reading! And if it is not…you are always welcome to close your window or move on to the next blog!